Last post on Divorced Over 50 was about female sexuality Over 50; now it’s the guys’ turn. And just as the post regarding women contained information relevant to men, this one should be of interest to the ladies, too.
So let’s start with a few things we know about male sexuality when it comes to us Boomers: Impotence is to be expected, libido diminishes, and sex can actually be dangerous. Right?
No. Wrong! Those are myths, and none of them are true.
This piece from MaleHealthCenter. com says that research shows nearly all men (and the majority of women) retain an interest in sex between the ages of 50 and 80. And that even if response isn’t what it once was, simply recognizing it takes longer to get aroused is often the “cure” for erectile dysfunction. In other words, before seeking a medical solution, try simple communication with your partner, letting her know that you need a lot of foreplay, too.
The article says that great sex is the result of knowing, understanding, and caring for your partner. It offers a few recommendations for creating the solid bond that leads to fulfilling sex, including:
- Be generous with your compliments, letting her know how attractive she is
- Try alternatives to penetration, as there’s plenty of pleasure to be had other than intercourse
- Communicate what you like, and ask her what works for her
- Avoid monotony by trying new locations and times of the day
Aimed at males Over 50, our friends at AARP offer “Six Ways to Make Lovemaking Great.” Its main take-away is that men don’t give their partners an orgasm; rather, it’s the man’s role to create the right context that allows the woman to have one (or more). And to help create those comfortable conditions, men should…
- Recognize most women require more than intercourse to climax
- Treat her entire body as an erogenous zone, not just a few specific areas
- Slow down, spending lots of time on the warm-up (which, as mentioned above, is important for men, too)
- Have lubricant available
- Mix it up and try something new (also mentioned above)
- Be open to including a vibrator in the love-making if the woman wants it
And to close this out, the online dating site Zoosk.com offers “What 50 Year Old Men Want in Bed.” Some of the suggestions aimed at women are similar to previous advice for men (be communicative, be spontaneous, take your time), but a few others haven’t been touched on before. These include:
- Have confidence, as men Over 50 want to be with someone comfortable in her own skin
- Let him know you’re enjoying it (hopefully), as a man’s number one need is to please his partner
- Be his lover only; don’t act like a mother trying to take care of him, nor needy and cutesy like a child needing to be taken care of.
Okay, so that’s equal time for the men (with a bonus for the women), but next post will absolutely have nothing to do with sex!
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